Quickly, a snapshot of me…. I have been friends with Mel for just over 10 years. Knowing her and all of the characters in her blog enhance the experience for me 10 fold. FYI, I would read it anyway just for the entertainment factor. So we chat on skype from time to time and our dialogue should be recorded. Seriously, it’s better than radio morning shows. Back on track…… So I like to peruse every issue in our discussions from a third party point of view. I try not to fit in any type of conformity on any issue (i.e. politics, religion, social or economical debate, etc.) Mostly because I don’t care about the details that everyone else seems to fall over. I don’t like or dislike any president because of his party affiliation; either he does a good job or not. I don’t find solitude in your issues because the invisible man in the sky you pray too (which may or may not be different than mine) told you everything will be fine and just keep praying. So lets put away our Obama bumper stickers and our rosary beads and lets talk about something we all need to really worry about……
REALITY TELEVISION
This is usually where you find yourself prematurely judging the blog. “I watch reality television, and I like it. This Spinner guy sucks.” Put down the pitchforks and torches and lets have a gander at what we are actually watching.
If I were to tell you that I would want you to give me money to watch your family through a cardboard square you attach to your face, what would you say? “Absolutely not”. You would think that your family is not as entertaining or not as beautiful as the people on the Jersey Shore.
** OH, and a quick side not on beautiful people. Science has shown that people find others attractive based on symmetry. People that are even and symmetrical are attractive to the eye.

Take away from the fact that these poor, poor ladies have misplaced portions of their swimsuits. The faces are all symmetrical. In fact, there are eight of them. Symmetry in the photograph; good work on the photographer’s part. One more……

You can sleep easy knowing that Hannah Hilton did not ask for one breast to be larger than the other at the surgeon’s office. If you can make it to her face, that’s symmetrical too. So being beautiful is more about nature blessing you with symmetry than what Gucci accessories you can slap on a 90-year-old woman with one peg leg and one eye patch. (Smart money says her breasts would be uneven too)
Yet, while you waste you life away waiting to see what “The Situation” is going to do next, reality is passing you by. You want to defend yourself by saying that you don’t actually pay money to the shows. But, you might buy the Glad bags or the Revlon makeup from the commercials, and they pay “Snookie”. So lets review some basic Mathmatics…
If A = B, and B = C, then… (Say it with me) A = C
You pay Revlon and Revlon pays Snookie, so you pay Snookie.
Guilty, NEXT CASE!
You pay Revlon and Revlon pays Snookie, so you pay Snookie.
Guilty, NEXT CASE!
You have to pay your cable and Satellite provider for the channel as well. A&E and Oxygen are not local channels even if you live next door to the station. So do us all a favor and turn around. Your kids are hungry, the grass needs to be cut, and you haven’t showered yet today. There’s a lot of free reality right behind you. I promise Snooky and The Situation will not even notice that you’ve left for someone better. Because you have left for someone better…. YOU!
In the interest of keeping it short, I’m wrapping this up for now. Later, if interested, we could discuss symmetry in Linguistics (-,--,-,--), or a multitude of other topics. Life is short, if you want to know what being dead is like, just remember what is was like before you were born… it will be just like that. So live it up. We’re all only here for a little while; thanks for being here with me for a little while tonight. Thanks so much to Mel for letting me in!! Lets hope she doesn’t change the locks.
Now Turn off Your TV! You’re missing the best reality show right behind you…
Spinner

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